Christmas Handicrafts

A few Christmases ago, The Frugal Hostess was flat broke.  She and FruHubs had spent a ton of money on their wedding [and, yes, their parents paid for everything, so how they accomplished that level of post-wedding poverty remains mysterious but may or may not be related to a year-long spending spree on things "for the wedding/honeymoon/to celebrate our engagement/because we're celebrating/etc."] and were living in a part of town they couldn't really afford.  Meanwhile, TFH had recently begun drinking an Al Gore-flavored Kool-Aid that made her want to decrease her consumption [conveniently, this coincided with a time when she would be consuming on behalf of others rather than herself].  So, she decided to make each and every one of the Christmas gifts that she and FruHubs would be giving to anyone.

Have you ever Googled "homemade Christmas gift" or "Christmas crafts"?  If you haven't, The Frugal Hostess will spare you.  Almost every result is either something made of macaroni like a small child would create (and then be too embarrassed to give you) or something so ridiculously complicated that you spend more money on the equipment that you would purchasing the non-homemade version of the same thing.  Hmmph.  Pipette, Martha?  Really???

Some parts of this DIY XMAS plan were easy.  TFH had gotten into paper crafts and had, before poverty struck, purchased a ton of supplies for making her own greeting cards and gift tags.  She bought a bunch of cheap wrapping supplies at after-Christmas sales the year before, and she had started her Regifting Closet.  So, you know, she wasn't totally screwed.

However.

However, there was a lot of this that was exceedingly hard and annoying.  So this year, as her Christmas gift to you, The Frugal Hostess plans to give you detailed instructions for make-it-yourself presents that are A.) not made of macaroni, and B.) don't require a huge amount of special equipment.  Merry Christmas!!!*

To get you started, here are some past posts that include great DIY presents.  TFH has a long list of things she'll be making on your behalf, but if you have an idea you'd like her to try, leave it in the comments or email it to frugalhostess [at] gmail [dot] com.

Homemade Grenadine
Limoncello and Other Cordials - PLEASE NOTE: these take six to eight weeks, so start now if you're doing them for Christmas!
Dog Biscuits

*On the whole Merry Christmas versus Happy Holidays debate, TFH comes down firmly on the side of say what you celebrate.  If you celebrate Kwanzaa, tell people, "Happy Kwanzaa."  If you celebrate Hanukkah, wish someone, "Happy Hanukkah."  And, obviously, if you celebrate Christmas, say, "Merry Christmas."  If you don't have a tradition, or if your tradition is one without nomenclature like Festivus or Solstice or Commercialus, and yet you still (maybe oddly) feel the need to throw out a seasonal wish, say, "Happy Holidays."  Just because you don't celebrate Hanukkah doesn't mean you should get offended at someone wishing you a happy one.  Duh.  Don't be an asshole.

photo by Kevin Dooley and Hans van de Bruggen

The Frugal Hostess wishes you the happiest of Happy Kwanzaas. Please send a card, or a comment of you're so inclined. You can also join the Frugalistas on Facebook for exclusive content, follow on Twitter @frugalhostess, or subscribe so that you always know when a new post appears.

Paper Fetish

Like many a lady, The Frugal Hostess admits to a certain fetish for paper. Stationery and art supplies knock her socks off, and she knows the difference between an A2 and an A4 envelope. Please don’t show her any embellished file folders or odd-shaped paper clips, or she’ll be forced to purchase them. In fact, TFH is one of the few people on earth who enjoys wrapping Christmas presents. All of this paper is expensive, though, and not just financially. The production of paper causes air pollution, solid waste, water and energy consumption, and all manner of unnecessary trouble. Check here and here and here and here for details. So what is a frugal fetishist to do? Well, in the case of The Frugal Hostess, she has decided to try to make some compromises that allow her to indulge her paper fantasies while positively impacting the environmental realities. First, here are the easy ones.
1. Change from regular to recycled toilet paper. If every household in the United States replaced just one roll of virgin fiber toilet paper (500 sheets) with 100% recycled ones, we could save 423,900 trees. Keep in mind that all brands are most decidedly not created equal, and TFH does not want you to suffer. She recommends Seventh Generation, which is softer than most and 100% recycled (80% post-consumer).
2. Limit yourself to one or two rolls of recycled paper towels per month (yes, you heard correctly). Take all of your stained bath towels and cut them into rags. Do the same with old tee-shirts. And buy a stack of matching dish towels that are attractive enough to hang in plain site but cheap enough that staining them will not break your heart. Get out the cloth napkins you have, and/or buy some that meet the above attractive but cheap qualifications. Then, when you spill something, wipe it up with a washable rag. When you eat dinner (or lunch, or breakfast), wipe your mouth with a cloth napkin. Clean your furniture with tee-shirt rags. You get it. You might need paper towels for a few things, like soaking up bacon grease or killing a roach, but most things that you use paper towels for are better accomplished using their washable siblings.
3. Switch sides. Of your printer paper, that is. Use a box or tray to collect paper that’s blank on one side. Cut some into quarters that you staple together to make notepads, and use the rest for scratch sheets and coloring canvasses.
Now, slightly harder: One of the more difficult projects The Frugal Hostess undertook last Christmas was to use only recycled wrapping supplies for her gifts (that may be why she talks about that so much on this blog, now that she thinks about it). In addition to reusing gift bags and tissue, TFH collected brown paper grocery bags on days when she forgot her cloth ones (they still have them, many with convenient handles). When the time came to wrap gifts, she carefully unglued the seams of the paper bags to make the biggest pieces possible, then cut them to size for her gifts. Using a snowflake stamp and some silver ink, TFH dotted each gift with a random dusting of snowflakes, and she tied them each with a piece of shiny, real ribbon. These were pretty cute, and they accomplished the no new wrapping paper goal.
However, this year, TFH has started collecting the bags early, and she’s planning to try out some more complicated techniques. She’s thought about sponge painting – not the faux finish kind popular in the 1990s. TFH plans to dilute paint with water, dip a sponge in it, and make wide stripes of color on the bags. If she does this far enough in advance, the paper will have plenty of time to dry. She’s also thought about using punches to cut out shapes, which she will back with recycled tissue paper. This should give the gift some texture and visual interest.
What other things could The Frugal Hostess do to brown paper bags to make them more exciting as gift wrap? Leave your ideas in the comments, and look for a post about this project in the next few weeks.

photo by Lara604

MIYMonday - Flea Fighting Dog Biscuits

The Frugal Homestead was recently infested with fleas. Boy, was it ever horrible. The Frugal Hostess and Husband started out trying not to use chemicals, researching home remedies and natural products that were supposed to rid the house of fleas. Well, friends, the fact of the matter is that, once the situation is advanced enough to qualify as a full-on infestation, the home remedies are just about useless. Bomb the crap out of the little buggers with chemicals, get rid of them, and then start your all-natural flea prevention campaign.

There are a number of different things you can do to prevent fleas from taking over your home. One of the most effective for TFH was to sprinkle Borax all over the carpet and big rug. Borax is a non-toxic, uh, thing – not sure if one would say non-toxic chemical? It’s a powder, kind of like baking soda, and it has a multitude of applications around the house. It is also very inexpensive. Anyway, if you sprinkle that around the house, leave it over night, and then vacuum it up the next day, it will kill/maim/destroy flea eggs without doing the same to your pets and yourself.

Another suggestion is to put a small amount of apple cider vinegar in your pets’ water each day; this is supposed to keep fleas away over time. Who knows how – probably something all sciency and boring. The Frugal Hostess made a solution of half water and half apple cider vinegar, then added to that a few drops of castile soap, a few drops of citronella oil, and a few drops of peppermint oil to mask the smell of the citronella (which is totally gross). If you don’t have cats, you could use tea tree oil instead of citronella oil (cats are opposed to the oil of the tea tree and will scratch your eyes out of you put it on them). TFH put all of that in a spray bottle and uses it as an all-purpose cleaner which has the added bonus of repelling bugs.

A final, and universally agreed-upon, natural solution is garlic. Apparently, fleas and other pests hate garlic and will stay off of your garlic-eating dog. Obviously, it might be a little awkward to feed your dog cloves of garlic, so here’s a recipe for garlicky dog treats. These have the added (subtracted?) bonus of having no gross chemicals or fillers, and you can even make them organic by choosing organic ingredients.

Ingredients

2 teaspoons yeast

Half cup lukewarm water

2 tablespoons parsley (optional)

3 tablespoons minced fresh garlic

1 1/2 cups chicken broth

3 tablespoons honey

1 egg

5 cups of whole wheat flour

Directions

1. Dissolve yeast in water.

2. Stir in all ingredients except flour.

3. Gradually blend in flour, adding enough to form a stiff dough.

4. Transfer to floured surface and knead 3-5 minutes or until smooth.

5. Roll and cut with cookie cutters (dog bone shape is best, but anything rather small will do).

6. Bake 30 minutes. Turn over and bake an additional 15 minutes.

7. Let cool overnight.

These last forever and freeze well. Enjoy! Woof!

Photo by Ashnikov

MIYM: Grenadine

Do you remember when you were little and went out to a special dinner with your family? The only thing that made it barely bearable was getting to drink a Shirley Temple filled with extra cherries by a server who was trying to keep you from throwing crushed cracker crumbs all over the floor. Shirley Temples are still the cocktail of choice for the toddler set, and The Frugal Hostess will admit to craving them every now and then (like, every time she is sick, or sad, or bored, or eating fried seafood - who knew?).

As we all know, The Frugal Hostess is also a fan of fully-leaded cocktails, especially old-fashioned ones that require muddling and steeping and other such nonsense. In her old age, TFH admits to a relatively new fondness for the much-maligned Girlie Drink - that sweet, easy-to-drink concoction that will kick your ass if you aren't careful. [This is in contrast to her former self, when TFH used to be a self-proclaimed drinking snob: gin and tonic in the summer, bourbon or rye and ginger ale in the winter, the end.] And, while The Frugal Husband prefers a straight-up gin martini with olives to just about anything (including TFH), he is ever so sweet and always on the look out for a new potion to mix up for his ungrateful wife.

It was during one such excursion into the lore of the Girlie Drink Slash Old Style Cocktail that The Frugal Husband discovered that grenadine is a frequent ingredient in his beloved's favorite style of libation. He dutifully proceeded to the liquor store to pick some up, and he found that every brand on the shelf listed as a main ingredient high fructose corn syrup. Now, there are ton of commercials the say HFCS is the same as sugar, blah blah blah, and, while that may be true (it's not), the dastardly sweetener is not welcome at The Frugal Homestead. So, Gentle Readers, The Frugal Husband did what any normal guy would do. He made some. From scratch. Which is unbelievably delicious. And also easy. Do it.

Ingredients
2 parts pomegranate juice
1 part sugar

Directions
1. Bring to a boil.
2. Reduce. Simmer until thickened to your taste.
3. Let cool. Refrigerate for quite some time.

The Frugal Husband is a way better cook than The Frugal Hostess. Luckily, TFH is a way better blogger than her husband, or this blog would be full of recipes for ribs, wings, and shots of Irish whiskey.

Photo by The Frugal Hostess

Make-It-Yourself Monday: Dairy Extravaganza

The Frugal Hostess is very sophisticated and also extra fancy. However, she does enjoy some good, old-fashioned, hand-made vittles. In particular, she likes to try to make things herself that you might ordinarily just purchase. Much to her delight, TFH found a soulmate in one Ms. Karen Solomon, author of the book "Jam It, Pickle It, Cure It." And thus was inspired a Dairy Extravaganza.

Prologue: Milk
Dairy comes from milk. Duh, of course. But, The Frugal Hostess cautions, the quality of the milk you use to make your dairy products directly impacts the quality of said products. Your milk shouldn't be ultra-pasteurized but can be pasteurized (the ultra is cooked too much for it to work correctly). You can use skim or 2% milk, but your end result will taste better if you use whole. And obviously use organic milk without hormones. The Frugal Hostess has been lucky enough to find a milk man who delivers raw "pet" milk from his farm to her area. He has to call it pet milk because it isn't pasteurized and thus a little more dangerous for people to drink, but TFH is willing to take the risk. It's delicious and makes great dairy. Try to find some farm-fresh milk, if you can.

Act One: Cheese
TFH actually started making cheese a while ago, using the 30 Minute Mozzerella and Ricotta Kit from Ricki the Cheese Queen. It could not be easier once you get the hang of it. She hates to say it, but you do need a couple of special ingredients and semi-unusual equipment to make this cheese, so The Frugal Hostess thinks you should buy the kit (it's, like, $25 and makes a ton). If you are a die-hard and want to just go for it, here's a recipe:

Equipment
6 to 8 quart stainless steel pot (not aluminum or cast iron)
Stainless steel slotted spoon
Two-quart microwave-safe mixing bowl
Measuring spoons and cup
Thermometer

Ingredients
Rennet tablet
Citric Acid
Gallon whole milk (not pasteurized!)
Salt

Directions
1. Try to cut the rennet tablet into quarters. You need ¼ of a tablet, but it’s not a big deal if you go a little over; just don’t go under. Dissolve the rennet in ¼ cup of water. Set aside.
2. Put 1 cup of water in your stainless steel pot and add 1½ teaspoons of citric acid. Stir well to dissolve.
3. Pour in gallon of milk and stir well.
4. Heat to 90 degrees Fahrenheit. Remove from burner and add rennet solution. Stir well, cover, and set aside for five minutes to rest.
5. You should have curd at this point. (If not, let it sit longer.) Cut it up in the pot. Put back on burner and heat to 105 degrees, stirring slowly.
6. use the slotted spoon to scoop the curds out of the whey and into the microwave-safe bowl. You can save the whey to use in recipes or to water your plants.
7. Microwave the curd on high for one minute, then drain off additional whey. Knead the cheese with your hands until it is cool enough to touch. (It’s super-hot! Be careful or wear rubber gloves.)
8. Microwave two more times for 30 seconds, draining and kneading as before. Add salt at the end. The cheese is ready when it is stretchy and sort of shiny.

Act Two: Butter

Butter is easy to make. The Frugal Hostess made hers with the same special milk as she uses to make cheese. Fill a glass jar halfway with milk, and shake it for 30 minutes or until butter is made. Deceptively easy sounding, huh? Except that the shaking nonsense takes forrreeevvver. And all you get is about a tablespoon of butter. The better way is to follow Solomon's instructions in "Jam It..." and use heavy cream; you will get a much better yield for the ass-kicking work your arms go through doing all that shaking.

Act Three: Yogurt

The Frugal Hostess found a recipe for making yogurt in ReadyMade magazine. You take 1 ½ tablespoons of plain yogurt and mix it with a quart of heated up milk, then let it sit in a heated up (and then turned off) oven for between six and 12 hours. It was kind of nerve-wracking to leave a dairy product out over night, so TFH put it in the fridge after six hours. The yogurt turned out fine, if a little more liquid than expected. The taste was delicious, and The Frugal Hostess expects that it will taste even better with some honey or agave syrup added in. Blueberries, sliced peaches, and wheat germ were good.


photo by NickPiggott