Tuesday, February 23, 2010

In Defense of Velveeta Fudge

The Frugal Hostess was recently at an event populated by a ton of food bloggers.  It was fun, for sure, but also kind of weird.  First of all, TFH doesn't consider herself a food blogger, per se.  Sure, there are recipes on this blog, but she's more of a lifestyle writer.  Or something.  Who knows.


Anyway, one of the serious food bloggers brought up Paula Deen and The Food Network.  She (the Serious Food Blogger) said that she thought the Food Network was ruining American food by featuring cooks like Paula Deen.  Or destroying it.  Or something like that.  She used as an example a recipe for fudge that Ms. Deen made using Velveeta as an ingredient.

[Is that gross?  Or kind of awesome?  Hard to say.]

Really?  Ruining food in America?  Crazy ole Paula Deen?  You must be joking.

Now, if you've ever read this blog before, you know that The Frugal Hostess is one of those crunchy granola-eating, scrap-composting, organic food-obsessing hippie yuppies.  Well, whatever the poor version of that is.  And she would never, ever give you some nasty, Sandra Lee version of a recipe that requires you to dye your noodles with yellow food coloring to make them look homemade.  Ick.  Really: buy as much local, organic, humane, fair food as you can, and make that a priority over almost everything else.  There.  TFH is on the record.

However.

FruHo would also like to go on the record as saying that the giant corporations who produce the bulk of our processed, chemicalized, genetically-modified Frankenfood get to take the blame for fucking up food in America.  Not Paula Deen, not the Food Network, and not even that most unholy of unholies, Sandra Lee.  Do not blame the victims, fancy Serious Food Blogger; go for the real villains who invented high fructose corn syrup and hydrogenated vegetable oil.

Furthermore, TFH would like to thank said monster companies for producing food that allows women to fulfill destinies other than those wrapped in apron strings.  If there were no take-out, no Tuna Helper, and no Velveeta, how many of us and our moms would be yanked out of the workplace and churning butter?  Sure, the food sucks and is built for profit rather than nutrition, but what if women still had to make everything from scratch?

Would it be better if everyone ate whole foods made with love at home?  Absolutely.  But we don't yet have a viable alternative that doesn't patronize the poor, pile work on people who are already stretched too thin, or otherwise move the target from agribusiness (where it belongs) to Ma and Pa.

We need a Slow Food Movement, but more than that we need a Slow Life Movement.

How else can we get the time to enjoy Grandma's Jello and Miracle Whip Salad?
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2 comments:

  1. Velvetta Fudge reminds me of Carrot Brownies. A well intentioned family member gave me Jessica Seinfield's Cook Book for moms (can't remember the name and too lazy to look it up - yeah it only involves an alt tab, but still too lazy) anyway... Her book involved putting pureed vegetables into stuff kids naturally eat muffins, brownies, etc. Which in theory sounds smart, but pureed carrots in brownies tastes like carrott brownies. Ick. Seriously what's wrong with just giving your kids some ranch dressing with the carrots? I could go on and on and on.... I did learn one good point from the book though...So what if your kids get filled up on veggies/fruits/dip/hummus before dinner? At least they are filled with nutrients instead of the Golden Arches. I gave the book away.

    Amen Sister. Let's get back to simple food. Simple Life. Fresh. Local. Homemade. Farmer's Markets. Spices.

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