Saturday, June 12, 2010

Something Sad. Also, Mother Nature is PISSED.

The bird nest is empty. 

The fern hanging basket that it was in fell off its hook during a storm, and the eggs smashed to the ground.  Some creature gobbled up the contents, and the mama bird has hightailed it out of here.  Now, this is obviously just part of the circle of life and all, but The Frugal Hostess can't help but take it personally.  It feels a little like Mother Nature is trying to prove a point. 

Further examples of the wrath of Mother Nature:

Exhibit A: Power Outage

Last week, the power went out.  Just after the sun went down.  While FruHubs was out of town.  Scary, scary, scary.  When there's no power, you can hear everything - a baby crying next door, cars honking miles away, and the wings of insects beating the air.  You can also hear your phone bleat with that little you-have-a-text-message sound, which happens a lot if your neighbor, the Pie-Making Carpenter, feels compelled to text you repeated pictures of sharp knives.   You know, to make you feel better about the murdering murderer who might have snipped the electrical wires before making his murderous way into the house.

Exhibit B: The Disappearing Kitten

One of the loudest noises on the night of the power outage was the sound of meowing on the front porch.  There was a teensy little baby orange kitten hiding out there in the corner, just screaming her head off.  But when TFH went to pick her up, the kitten hauled ass and did laps around the house.  Like, 14 laps.  The next day, the cat reappeared across the street but again wouldn't get caught, slipping into the crawl space of a vacant house.  The Frugal Hostess made a path of tuna from the hiding spot to her front porch, but the kitten never came back out.

Exhibit C: Maggoty Maggots and Fleas

FruHo can't really discuss this.  It's enough to gag a maggot.  Rest assured, the maggots are gone, and TFH may or may not have put her non-toxic bug spray beliefs on the shelf for a quick minute.  The fleas are apparently just going to be a summer scourge, because, according to the vet, sand fleas live in Georgia with or without an animal host.  Gross!  And, thanks for nothing, Mother Nature.

Exhibit D: The Last Shrimp Boil

FruHubs had a birthday party for FruHo.  Among other amazing things, he boiled up some Gulf shrimp with potatoes, corn, and sausage.  It was delicious, and everyone loved it.  Probably for the last time.  Screw you, BP.

The end.

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  1. Will you consider it the sincerest form of flattery or wholesale idea theft if I do a shrimp boil at my party next week? It was SO GOOD.

  2. Sand fleas, thanks for the reminder. I spent three months one summer in South Carolina. Those things are evil.

  3. Sara, pleeeeease have a shrimp boil! I barely had any shrimp, so it will give me a chance at a do-over. I will bring cupcakes, or something else if you prefer.

  4. Sad news about the bird eggs. We had the same thing happen once, and I was so distressed. Ours were doves. But, the next year, we had a new family, and they survived.

  5. I am probably going to do it for the 4th of July party, rather than this week. I think this week will be tapas-y.

  6. Sounds like you are living in act one of a horror movie.


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