Guest Blogger: LeekFixer Gets TFH in Le~Fix

During the first Eat on $30 Challenge, The Frugal Hostess had the pleasure to "meet" Leekfixer on Twitter.  He's been a faithful online friend every since. Leekfixer writes about his suburban farming adventures on The Funny Farm, and, when she read that he had recently made her favorite-food-of-all-time pate, FruHo insisted that he write about it here.  And now, Gentle Friends, TFH is truly in Le' Fix about pate. 

Hi Ya’ll, Leekfixer here. Leekfixer is not used to writing in 3^rd person so he hopes you can forgive him if he messes up once in a while. He noticed that The Frugal Hostess shortens her name to FruHo when she writes her posts. Leekfixer figures she is trying to save space on the page, you know, being her frugal self. (really he thinks she’s lazy but don’t tell her I , we, he said that ;). Leekfixer figured he’d follow her lead and shorten his name too. Le’Fix . Seems about right since this post is about French food.

Le’Fix was at a party a while back where they were serving lots of really good food. One thing in particular he really liked was some kind of spread on crackers. He asked the fella who was having the party what it was, and The Fella said it was pate´. Le’Fix asked what was in it. The Fella said it was chicken livers. Well Le’Fix has eaten fried chicken livers before, and he did not like them all that much [Editor’s note: Because Le’Fix is insane.] but he really liked this French version.

He was rooting around in the freezer the other day and found a package of chicken livers he got from the local grassfed beef farm in the summer. Le’Fix was going be throwing his own party (that’s English for soireé) so he decided to make some of those French fried chicken livers. Being a man, Le’Fix doesn’t really like to follow directions, but, seeing as how he did not have a clue as to how the French make that pate´ he figured he better look it up on the internet. He got really excited when he read the recipe (French for directions) because it said to used four of his favorite things: bacon fat (Le’Fix always called it bacon grease but La’Fix - French for Le’Fix’s wife - said he should call it bacon fat because grease makes it sound like the stuff that is leaking out from under his truck), uh, anyway, bacon fat, garlic, butter and party likker. Yeah, there’s chicken livers in there too.

Like he said earlier, Le’Fix doesn’t much like to follow directions so he made some changes to the recipe. For one thing it called for something called ghee. What the heck is ghee?  It’s not even French; he found out on the internet. So he figured he’d use some bacon grease fat instead. The directions called for 6 oz. of ghee so Le’Fix figured he would probably need to fry up a whole package of bacon to get that much fat. He got the bacon frying in the cast iron skillet. Then he rounded up the rest of the stuff he needed. He got a couple sticks of butter out of the fridge. The recipe called for shallots which Le’Fix figured was French for garlic so he chopped up six big, fat cloves. Then he noticed that the directions called for soaking the chicken livers in milk for four hours or overnight. Well, Le’Fix had lots of stuff to do for the party so waiting til tomorrow was not an option. He poured the milk over the livers and stuck them in the fridge where he didn’t have to look at them because they looked pretty gross.

The next thing he saw he needed was sherry which he knew was some fancypants kind of French party likker. He figured party likker was party likker so he looked in the old party likker cabinet and found an open bottle of Scotch whiskey. Le’Fix grew up in the Valley of Virginia where lots of Scottish folks settled. He has some Scottish blood in him too, so he figured it would work OK. This pate´ is already turning into some kind of international dish anyway what with the ghee and all so he figured adding another country would be just fine. By now Le’Fix had worked up a powerful thirst so he poured himself a shot of party likker and tossed it back. Then he ate about half the bacon. He couldn’t help himself. The smell was overpowering his self-control. [Editor’s note: Sounds like The Frugal Hostess’s style of cooking bacon – one for the plate, one for her mouth.]

While he was waiting for the livers to soak up the milk (gross) he decided to make some crackers to put the pate´ on for the party. Le’Fix  does not trust anything that comes in a box or can, no matter what it says on the label. He figured ya’ll might like to make your own crackers too so he posted his cracker recipe here.  [Editor’s note: If you don’t already, please start reading the Funny Farm. It’s funny and farmy.]

He figured he might as well have another shot of party likker and finish off the bacon then get to putting the pate´ together. He tossed the garlic into the bacon fat, drained the milk off of the livers (gross) and tossed them into the pan just like the Southern do when frying up chicken livers. The directions said to let them cook until they got brown and most of the liquid (considerable it said) had been cooked off. After that it said to deglaze the pan with the party likker. Le’Fix figured what that meant was to pour the party likker into the pan with the livers. It said to use a half a cup which, if Le’Fix calculated right, was equal to 4 shots. Whoohoo this pate´is gonna be good! The bottle was almost empty by now so Le’Fix figured he might as well finish it off so he could put in the recycle bin. He did, too.

Then he read that he should put in some rubbed sage. Well by this time Le’Fix was in no mood to be rubbing on some sage so he got some fresh marjoram (he grew it himself) out of the fridge and proceeded to chop it up Morimoto style. He figured it was about 2 tablespoons but things were getting a little blurry by now so he wasn’t really sure. He tossed the marjoram at the pan and let everything cook down like it said until the party likker was gone.

Much of the rest of the process was a blur but Le’Fix remembers taking the pan off the stove and burning the crap out of his hand. While he was doctoring up his hand the concoction had cooled down enough to put into the food processor with 1 and ½ sticks of the softened butter. He really likes salt so he put a pinch or 2 in there and whirled it around until it looked like, well, until it was smooth and creamy.[Editor’s note: Gross.]

Next the directions said to spoon it into a ramekin. WTF is a ramekin? Must be French for some kind of fancypants bowl. So Le’Fix got out his fanciest bowl and scooped the pate´ into it. Then he smoothed it out on top really good, put some rosemary leaves on there for decoration (he grew it himself) then poured the remaining ¼ stick of melted butter over the top to seal the deal.

Tres Bien!

Chicken Liver Pâté

Ingredients:
1 lb livers from pasture-fed chickens
1 pint fresh milk
fat from 1 lb. bacon (about 1/2 cup)
6 cloves garlic, finely chopped
2 tablespoons fresh marjoram, finely chopped
½ cup scotch whiskey
¼ teaspoon sea salt
1¾ sticks of butter softened to room temperature
Fresh rosemary leaves (for garnish)

Instructions:
1.  Rinse chicken livers gently, drain them and put them in a bowl.
2.  Pour the fresh milk over the chicken livers and allow them to marinate for at least 4 hours.
3.  Heat bacon fat in a skillet until melted.
4.  Add the diced garlic and simmer over low heat until translucent (be careful not to burn it). About 10 minutes.
5.  Drain the chicken livers.
6.  Add the chicken livers to the onions and bacon fat. Simmer chicken livers until cooked through and until the liquid has cooked down to a thick sauce. About 20 minutes.
7.  Add the marjoram, salt, and the scotch whiskey.
8.  Continue to cook until the scotch has been reduced to a thick sauce. About 10 minutes.
9.  Allow the mixture to cool.
10.  Add the liver mixture and 1½ sticks of softened butter to a food processor and process until smooth.
11.  Spoon pâté into a bowl, smooth the top surface and garnish with fresh the rosemary leaves.
12.  Melt the remaining 2 tablespoons of butter ( if you have any more bacon fat you can use it in place of the butter) and gently pour over the top of the pate´ covering the whole surface.
13.  Place the pate in the refrigerator for a few hours to allow it to set up. The butter topping helps to preserve it and keep the top moist. It will keep in the refrigerator for a couple of weeks while undisturbed.
14.  Remove it from the refrigerator at least four hours before serving.

The Frugal Hostess is craving pate. Please comment. You can also join the Frugalistas on Facebook for exclusive content, follow on Twitter @frugalhostess, or subscribe so that you always know when a new post appears.

Things TFH Learned from Eat on $30

1.  It has been a long time since The Frugal Hostess felt really hungry.  That probably has something to do with her current dress size.  During Eat on $30, she was hungry for every meal and full after each one.  That felt somehow virtuous, in a Little House in the Big Woods way.

2.  Food tastes better when you are really hungry for it.  TFH wasn't kidding when she said that the half-quail was the best she'd ever had.

3.  Being hungry makes you sleepy.  Or, at least, it made TFH sleepy.  She slept an average of one extra hour per night and started feeling ready for bed about two hours earlier than usual each evening.

4.  If you are poor, the dollar menu at McWendysKing really, really gives you a better value than eating fresh food.  That sucks. It would be really great if one of the fast food giants would make something healthy for a buck, but no one can grow food fairly at those prices.

5.  If you are not poor, ask yourself if you really want to eat something that can be grown, processed, cooked, and served for one dollar.  What kind of shortcuts do you think have to be taken to make that kind of economy work?

6.  [Insert bathroom observations here.]  Too untoward for The Frugal Hostess to comment on.

7.  It seems like the only way to supplement a $30 weekly food budget is to grow some of your own.  TFH started digging up the vegetable garden as a result of Eat on $30, so be forewarned that you'll be hearing about it.

8.  Maybe a second way to supplement that budget is to make a lot of things, like chicken stock and bread, from scratch.  The Frugals have been working on that for the past couple of years, but it takes up a lot of time.  (Many other Eat on $30 peeps have talked about the time, equipment, and knowledge issues, so TFH will leave it at this: they are right.)

9.  The Frugals eat way more meat than is necessary.

10.  There is an organization, Wholesome Wave Foundation, that makes it possible for folks who receive public assistance to get double their value at some farmers' markets.  Wow.  Isn't that cool?  So, if you have $10 in food stamps, you can get $20 worth of food at the markets that participate.  The Frugal Hostess will be eating on $30 one week a month and giving the difference to Wholesome Wave; you can do the same or donate now.

OK, FruHo promises to be funnier next time.  Love you!!!!

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The Eat on $30 Participants

The Frugal Hostess realized that she had forgotten to include the list of Eat on $30 participants.  They are all great bloggers, and it's been really interesting getting to know them.  Give 'em some love!

• Tami of Running with Tweezers - Twitter @runwithtweezers
• Betty Joan of Trouble With Toast - Twitter @bettyjoan
• Carrie Neal of carrienealland - Twitter @carrienealland
• Paula of Bell'alimento - Twitter @bellalimento
• The Broke Socialite - Twitter @brokesocialite
• Jimmy of Eat It Atlanta - Twitter @EatItAtlanta
• Robert of WhizKid Sound - Twitter @rdyson
• Jen of Use Real Butter - Twitter @userealbutter
• Mike's $30 Project Blog - Twitter @boutte
• Zach of Mise en Face - Twitter @drzachary
• Hailey of Hail’s Kitchen - Twitter @hailskitchen
• Susan of Doughmesstic - Twitter @doughmesstic
• Diana of Spain in Iowa Twitter @dianabauman
• Kristina of Tennessee Locavore Twitter @TNLocavore
• Saul - @saulyoung

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Why The Frugal Hostess Would Rather Eat Organic Than Buy Shoes

The main reason The Frugal Hostess decided to do the Eat on $30 Challenge was that she wanted to prove to the world you could eat organic on a budget.  Or, maybe, she wanted to prove it to herself.  This is a constant debate she has with The Frugal Husband: that organic food may be a little more expensive, but with the right amount of planning you can do it without a major change in your food budget.

Sample conversation:

TFHostess: Erg, I’m hungry, I want some wine, whine whine whine, when will this Eat on $30 crap be over?

TFHusband: I could do Eat on $30 and drink wine, because I am super awesome and would stop buying organic food.

TFHostess: Um, what’s the point of that?  You wanna die from cancer or have a son with a small penis* just to be able to afford some wine?  [Point.  Set.  Match.]

(*Just read that chemicals in our food can be blamed for smaller penis size.  That’s right, ladies; use that in your next organic argument with the Hubses.)

Also, The Frugal Hostess has noticed that FruHubs (ya like that?) has been sneaking a lot of conventional produce into the house, under the guise of it being local (i.e., grown in this state) and cheaper.  Now, local is good – it racks up fewer food miles, supports the local economy, and makes sense from a larger “what you’re supposed to eat” perspective.  But The Frugal Hostess can’t help but wonder if buying local produce sometimes lets us feel better about wimping out on putting our money where our mouths (and stomachs) are when it comes to doing right by the planet.  Put another way, what is better: local pesticide or non-local organic?  (And, duh, local and organic is obviously the answer, but that isn’t always as easy as it sounds.)

FruHo realizes this is a nice, comfortable, yuppie dilemma to be in, BTW.  But she’s in it, so might as well try to sort it out.

Reasons to Eat Organic, according to The Frugal Hostess’s cursory Google research

1.  Less pollution of the air, soil, and water.

2.  Like, a lot less.

3.  Better for farm workers to not have to ingest poison all day every day.

4.  Chemical pesticides have been implicated in diabetes, obesity, cancer, autism, Parkinson's disease, male sterility, genital deformities, female infertility, miscarriage, infant deformities, ADHD, hormonally caused gender confusion, asthma, allergies, accelerated aging, and smaller penises in boys, amphibians, and other wildlife. 

Think about that for a minute. 

Have you ever asked yourself why it seems like some of the things listed above are happening at staggeringly increased rates now compared to when you were little or Olden Times or whatever?

Something else The Frugal Hostess found:

”Don’t give up organic for local. Food that’s both local and organic is the gold standard. But while it’s true that food produced locally generally has a smaller carbon footprint than food transported across the country (or from another continent), the carbon emitted by transporting food is smaller than that released by growing it with chemical means. [emphasis by TFH] In fact, PepsiCo recently documented that, for its Tropicana orange juice, transporting the product accounted for only 22% of its carbon footprint.”

So, the conclusions drawn from TheFrugal Hostess’s extremely rigorous scientific research into this topic are:

1.  Local AND organic is best.

2.  If you have to choose one over the other, choose organic.

3.  There are ways to buy organic on a budget.

4.  But it takes A LOT of planning and organization.  Or organic-ization.  Ha.

More to come, lovies.

UPDATE: Duh, today is Blog Action Day on climate change, and TFH didn't even realize it.  How's that for serendipity?

photo by Rhett Maxwell

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Stages of the Eat on $30 Challenge

Denial: On Day 1, The Frugal Hostess barely paid attention to what she was eating, figuring she could make it up later (luckily, almost everything she ate was free that day).  $30 would be plenty for her, and she would show those people who flat-out refuse to eat organic because of the prices.  Yep, TFH was certain that her success at eating organic on a budget would be so great that she would light up the night, winning hearts and minds across the land.  Ha!  Pure, straight up denial, Dear Readers.

Anger: About mid-way through Day 2, FruHo started to actually calculate her daily budgets.  She divided the cost of her CSA box over the seven days ($1.43 per day) and realized that she would have to charge herself $1 a day for the convenient but expensive fair trade whole bean coffee purchased from her neighborhood spot.  So, out of a daily budget of $4.28, $2.43 was already consumed by local organic veggies (ordered before she committed to the challenge) and non-negotiable coffee.  The Frugal Hostess quickly realized that, unless Robert Mondavi swept into town to inexplicably woo a third-person blogger with free bottles of wine, she wouldn’t be having so much as a sip of the 3+ cases in The Frugal Homestead for another five days.  WTF, y’all? 

Bargaining: As regular readers know, The Frugals Hostess and Husband are pretty strict about not wasting food.  They practice the ancient art of Fruit Rescue, they make pickles, and they freeze everything.  There were six quail that needed to be eaten, and eaten now.  Meanwhile, at two bucks a bird, just eating one would blow the budget before another bite was taken.  TFH talked it over with the Hubs, and they weighed some options.  Could she pretend it was chicken on the blog?  No, she had already outed the quail on Facebook.  Could she eat two and make it up later in the week?  Sure, if eating wild chives pulled up from her dog-pee watered lawn would count as meals for the rest of the week.  Could she just.  Have.  One.  Freaking.  Glass of Wine?  The stress of all this bargaining was started to take its toll.

Depression: As she calculated the cost of her meals for the rest of the week, a dark swarming cloud of gloom began to circle.  There was no way she could succeed!  Her stomach was about to mount a campaign to eat her spleen!  Just look how yum-tastic those little quails looked!  And seriously, where the hell was Robert Mondavi?! 

Acceptance: The Frugal Hostess slapped herself across the face (metaphorically-speaking).  “FruHo,” she thought, “You signed up for this voluntarily!  It is only day three!  Get a hold of yourself!  What kind of a worthless @#$%^&* are you?”  And thus, TFH ate a giant bowl of rice and beans and one half of one quail.  And it was the most delicious, scrumptious, glorious half a quail she ever tasted.

The Frugal Hostess is feeding on your comments. Don't starve her.  You can also join the Frugalistas on Facebook for exclusive content, follow on Twitter @frugalhostess, or subscribe so that you always know when a new post appears.

Days 1&2

So, here's the thing.  Yesterday was kind of a cheater day to start Eat on $30, because The Frugal Husband came back from his Football Pilgrimage with a bunch of leftovers that his dad paid for.  Everything was free, except coffee ($1), apple ($.50), and bun ($.50).

Day 1 total: $2 

By the way, The Frugal Husband isn't playing.

Also yesterday, The Frugal Hostess did some prep work to get ready for the week on a budget.  While it would probably have made sense to take $30 to the grocery store and buy everything for the week, the CSA box had already been delivered before TFH knew she was going to participate. We all know how she feels about wasting organic produce - completely against the rules.  So, FruHo will be estimating the prices of some items based on Googling them.

This brings up an interesting point.  The Frugal Hostess has a house full of organic food and spices and staples like flour.  Her pantry is well-stocked, so she can use twelve cents worth of paprika in a dish, stay well within the Eat on $30 budget, and still get something pretty good.  Not so if you don't have the money to stock a pantry, like if you are on public assistance.  What if you had to buy the herbs to season your dish as you needed them, rather than having a storehouse of stuff?  You couldn't, of course, because you can't buy twelve cents worth of paprika, and a $21 (or $30) budget doesn't allow for the whole jar.  How do you build up a stock of the condiments and oils that let you eat good food pretty cheaply on a regular basis without some kind of start-up cash?

As she was saying, TFH did a good amount of prep work to get ready for the week.  She had read a recipe a few months back for miniature frittatas and, being a haphazard breakfast eater, decided having them pre-made would help her out.  Here's how she made them (which in no way resembles the original recipe, which is why there's no link; she would probably get sued for saying these are like the ones that inspired them):

Ingredients:
6 eggs ($3.50 per dozen organic, pasture-raised eggs, or $1.75 for this recipe)
Approx. 1 pound of potatoes ($.50, Googled)
Half an onion ($.32, Googled - Vidalias)
2-3 cloves of garlic (Organic, $.10, guessing)
Shredded cheese (maybe 4 ounces) (Organic, $4 block from Trader Joe's, $1 for this recipe)
Splash of milk or cream (Organic, $.30)
Couple pats of butter
Salt and pepper

Directions:
1.  Peel and cube the potatoes.  Like, small home-fry type cubes.  Steam them until soft.
2.  Finely dice the onion.  Saute in butter on low to medium heat until very soft.
3.  Grate the cheese.
4.  Mince the garlic and add to the onions at the very end; cook for a minute or so longer.
5.  Let all of the above ingredients cool down (do the steps below during the cooling-off period), then mix together in a bowl.  Add salt and pepper.
6.  Grease a 12-muffin tin.  Then, cut circles out of parchment paper and drop them in the holes.  (TFH realizes this sounds stupid but you have to do it or the frittatas won't come out.)  Another option is to take the mini-muffin papers, turn them inside-out, and use those.  You don't want the full-size muffin cups because they take up too much space, eliminate the crust, and are just generally a nuisance.  To recap, put something down there.  You know, in the hole.
7.  Fill each hole about two-thirds full of the potato mixture.
8.  In a measuring cup or bowl with a spout, beat the eggs with a splash of milk, salt, and pepper.  Fill the remaining space in each muffin cup with beaten egg.  You'll notice why the spout was suggested.
9.  Bake for 25-30 minutes at 350 degrees.

When they're done, you'll have 12 delicious little frittatas to eat for breakfast!  TFH made them Sunday and then microwaved them for 60 seconds before eating this morning.  You probably need to eat two.  Some variations that would be good: add bacon or ham; use sweet potatoes and leeks; try spinach and mushrooms.  So, with the recipe costing $4 for 12, these little guys are $.33 each, or $.67 for a serving of two.  And The Frugal Hostess's stomach is growling.  More on Day Two tomorrow....

The Frugal Hostess would like to eat a comment. Please leave one for her. You can also join the Frugalistas on Facebook for exclusive content, follow on Twitter @frugalhostess, or subscribe so that you always know when a new post appears.

The Eat on $30 Project

The Frugal Hostess reads lots of other bloggers.  Some are funny, some are serious; some write about business, and some focus on politics.  Some are even about her very own family.  But the ones that are always fun to read are the food blogs. 

When The Frugal Hostess read this post on Running with Tweezers, she knew she couldn't sit this one out.  In addition to being moved by the fact that those on public assistance get only $21 a week for their food, she feels like an exercise in food frugality will be good for her blog and her figure.  Also, it will hopefully help FruHo prove to the doubting haters (you know who you are) that you can eat a mostly organic diet without going broke.  We shall see.

Stay tuned this week for a run-down on the trials and tribulations of the Eat on $30 Project, or follow along on Twitter using the hashtag #eaton30.


photo by 96dpi

The Frugal Hostess might be hungry. Please distract her with a comment. You can also join the Frugalistas on Facebook for exclusive content, follow on Twitter @frugalhostess, or subscribe so that you always know when a new post appears.